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“.. Let us not love in words words or tongue but with action and in truth.” There’s a weight in these words that has been cemented in my soul and engraved in my mind. There’s an urgency in these words.

I think the heart of every parent is to love their child. Most of us do the best we can. I think our downfall is that we think we know so much, ya know? I’ve always found it peculiar that people will spend thousands of dollars and hundreds of hours learning how to excel at their dream job, whatever that may be; but when it comes to our children and raising these beautifully complicated souls we just wing it.

One day I decided my kids deserved better than that. That was the day I picked up this book.

The 5 Love Languages of Children 

 Who is this book for: 

“The 5 Love Languages of Children,” is for parents particularly, but the principles can be applied to any adult figure who wants to learn how to connect with and love on their kiddos in the way they best receive and understand love.


As you read through The 5 Love Languages of Children the authors guide you through the basics of each love language, what they mean, and how to use them to build and foster a strong relationship with your kiddos. The love languages you will learn about are:

  1. Physical Touch
  2. Words of Affirmation
  3. Quality Time
  4. Gifts
  5. Acts of Service


My Experience:

I used to think there was a universal way to love people. After reading the 5 Love Languages of Children I now advocate for the opposite perspective.

I see it with my own kids every day. Each of them is so unique, and they way they understand and receive love is just as unique.

“Well, hey there, handsome.” That’s all I have to say to paint a smile on my 3-year-old’s face. He loves to be complimented and to hear that he’s appreciated; so much so that if I forget to say thank you when he helps me with my chores He’ll remind me. That’s an example of words of affirmation; words that edify or encourage a loved one.

My Jude Dude, He’s all about physical touch. Not having that hug in the morning or right before nap time can literally make or break his day. His day starts and end (and is filled with) hugs. He needs that. He needs kisses goodnight, and “high-fives” for good behavior, and tickles for fun. To him, those things say, “I love you.”

These are some of the things “The 5 Love Languages” helped me realize about my kiddos. Now that I know their love languages, I can show my boys I love them in the ways that mean the most to them.


The 5 Love Languages of Children won’t tell you how to raise perfectly lovable kids, but it does teach you how to identify the way your child best receives love. It helps you discover their love language. We all give and receive love in different ways. Learning to love your kids on their level is priceless.

Have you thought about what your child’s love language is? Can you identify it from the explanations above? Or what about your love language?

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19 thoughts on “The 5 Love Languages of Children”

  1. This book definitely changed my perspective on loving people as well. It changed my life. Another one is “How to Make Friends and Influence People.” It’s all about the other person, not you. Great review!

  2. I know these are supposed to be great books, but I have never read any of them. I have checked the original out of the library multiple times with good intentions and I think we may even own two of the other versions, but I’ve never gotten to it. Too many books and too little time.

    1. I know how that goes! Been there with so many great books. I just started slowly diving into them over the past year or so.

  3. My spouse and I have read the 5 Love Languages and it is really an informative book. I am going to have to think about this with my six year old grandson, whom I watch daily. I think his might be Quality Time. He love to play with me and do pretend. He also loves to watch movies together. I’m not sure what his mom would say is his love language, I’ll have to ask. Thanks for the good post. – Amy

  4. All of my kids are completely different in how they perceive my affection. What’s good for one is actually hurtful to the other at times. This is a great resource to help understand how to be more effective in loving someone where they are rather then forcing them to conform and figure you out.

    1. I love his book for children and he has one for teens too and dating couples I believe. I’m a big fan of his work! And you’re right, it’s never too late to learn!

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