When I first heard of the book “Loving Our Kids On Purpose,” by Danny Silk I laughed. In my head, I thought, “Loving our kids on purpose?… As opposed to by accident? What a stupid title.”
Well, I stand corrected. It didn’t take long for this book to pull at my heart and completely shatter and transform my parenting perspective. Let me tell you all about it.
Who Is This Book For?
Loving Our Kids On Purpose was written for parents and parent figures. However, a lot of the principles can also be applied outside of the parent-child relationship. I could see pastors, school teachers, and mentors putting these principles to practice and radically transforming the lives of the children they interact with.
Through Loving Our Kids On Purpose, Danny walks the reader through the process of teaching their children to honor relationships and make choices that will protect their relationship from hurt, which is essence is what God does for us. God knows eternal separation from us would break His heart, but He also knows that a love that is forced is not genuine love. So He gives us the option to love Him and live our lives in a way that protect His heart from shattering. But He also gives us the option to break His heart.
It is with this understanding that Danny defines his (and our) role as parents, teaching that it is not our job to demand of our children but instead it is our responsibility to teach our children how to manage and walk in the freedom that God has blessed them with. Danny shares practical tips and insight aimed to help parents and parent figures accomplish this goal.
I’ll be honest with you, Loving Our Kids On Purpose was an extremely convicting and inspiring read. It completely transformed my perspective on parenting. BUT… Applying this concept and these principles to mine and my children’s lives has been such a challenge (to put it lightly). As I put these steps into practice I realized that there are some essential skills that I should have a firm grasp on as a parent, yet I don’t. Patience is one of them.
All that being said, as I continue to develop the skills I need to teach and love on my children I’m noticing the positive change in their behavior as well. There is less arguing, less frustration, fewer tears, and a lot more fun in our home. It’s been incredible to witness. It hasn’t exactly been easy, but that’s ok. Most good things require effort, right?
I highly recommend that every parent read this book! Applying these principles has done a lot for my relationship with my kiddo’s. More importantly, though, this book has helped me draw near to God. It has taught me how to better protect my relationship with Him.
There is so much wisdom in these pages! It’s a paradigm shift for sure, but like I said, it’s worth it.
Have you taken this approach in your parenting before? How did it work for you?