Want to Know the Secret to Nurturing An Enjoyable, Purposeful, Lasting Marriage?
If you’ve been keeping up with our marriage chats in the LWP Facebook group (join future chats here!) you’ll know this month we’ve been addressing the 5 Love Languages. In fact, I just launched a really awesome hands-on, 5 Days of Love Languages Challenge. And since I know this is a topic the wives in my community have been wanting to dig into, we’re going to be doing exactly that. We’re going to learn all about the 5 Love Languages; what they are and how to apply them to our marriage. Today we are going to tackle Physical Touch.
If your man is a physical touch man, it means those small moments where you’re cuddled on the couch or holding hands, or simply placing your hand on the small of his back – mean a lot to him. Possibly even more than you know. That touch is what cements the reality of your love and appreciation in his mind. Your touch is a powerful gift! So today, be intentional about using touch to show your man you love him. Maybe welcome him at the door with a big ol’ kiss when he comes home from work. Or walk up behind him and wrap your arms around him while he’s cooking dinner.
Not married? This post may be better suited for you.
Remember, the Love Languages are all about loving your husband where HE’s at. Physical Touch may not be your thing, but if your husband responds well to it, you may want to consider putting in the effort. Just like a car can’t get anywhere on an empty gas tank, neither you or your husband will be able to create the marriage you want with when your love tanks are empty. That’s part of why it’s so important to know and speak your husband’s love language. Speaking his love language is the only way to keep his love tank full. And he needs you for that.
If you’re like me, loving through physical touch is not something that comes naturally. But it can be learned (thankfully)! Remember, physical touch doesn’t just mean sex (although sex fits in this category too). There are plenty of sweet little love touches that are included in this love language. You’ll find a list of them here.
50 Ideas to Try If His Love Language Is Physical Touch
1. Play with his hair.
2. Hold his hand.
3. Hug more.
4. Kiss often.
5. Cuddle on the couch.
6. Play “footsie” at the table.
7. Rest your head on his shoulders.
8. Let him rest his head in your lap.
9. Massage his feet.
10. Take a bath or shower together.
11. Slow dance.
12. Rest your hands on the small of his back.
13. Hug him from behind.
14. Kiss his neck.
15. Give his bum a “love tap”
16. Plan an intimate night for just the two of you.
17. Get him a body massage.
18. Kiss his forehead.
19. Squeeze his hand when you say goodbye.
20. Greet him at the door with a kiss.
21. Sit in his lap (when the setting is appropriate).
22. Cuddle with him for a few extra minutes in the morning.
23. Initiate sex. Now I know for a lot of women the idea of initiating sex isn’t exactly comfortable. I get it. If you’re struggling with this idea I encourage to check out Sheila Gregoire’s, “Good Girl’s Guide to Sex.” Don’t let the title freak you out. Sheila has got an amazing biblical perspective on sex and healthy sexuality. If you want to learn from anyone, she’s a good choice.
24. Place his hand on your tummy or waist when you’re cuddled up together.
25. Rub/touch his arm when you walk past him.
26. Give him a bear hug.
27. Have a “wrestling match”
28. Or a “tickle fight”
29. Cup his face in your hands when you kiss him.
30. Cup his face in your hands and just take a moment to treasure him.
31. Sit close.
32. At restaurants, reach across the table and ask to hold his hand.
33. Walk arm in arm.
34. Hold hands while driving (when it’s safe).
35. Squeeze his hand while you pray for him.
36. Wash his hair and massage his scalp.
37. Wink at him.
38. Foreplay. Yes, I can feel you get squirmish. Let me encourage you by saying your marriage bed is your own, and as long as you aren’t crossing biblical boundaries there should be no shame in sexual intimacy with your husband. If you’re feeling like there is, I encourage you to talk about it with your husband. Set boundaries that keep you both feeling safe and loved. And again I highly recommend Good Girl’s Guide to Sex.
39. Wash his back in the shower.
40. Kiss him like it’s the last kiss you’ll ever get.
41. Lotion his hands and give him a mini spa-like treat.
42. Whisper in his ears the many reasons why you love him.
43. Scratch his back.
44. Use your body language to flirt with him.
45. Grab his arms and wrap them around your waist.
46. Put your hand in his back pocket while you walk together.
47. Enjoy each other’s space.
48. Grab him by the neck and pull him close.
49. PDA (just keep it appropriate).
50. Ask for feedback! Make it a point to ask how your man what sort of touch makes him feel loved. Take his input into account when initiating touch.
Whew! That’s quite a list! But trust me it doesn’t end there. In fact, I bet you’ve got a couple sweet ideas that didn’t even make it on my list. I’d love to hear about them below! Leave a comment with your suggestions!
<3 Lo Tanner