Know your identity, know your Worth, and know your priorities. These are three of the four truths we’ve been chatting about most recently in my article “4 Truths to Know About You BEFORE Getting Into A Relationship.”
Today we are going to tackle truth #4. Ladies, let’s talk about boundaries.
You Are Worth Protecting!
The simple truth of it is this; you are worth protecting and I mean that in every sense of the word. Your soul, your heart; you as a being are worth protecting. Why? Because you carry value as a Daughter of the King. It goes back to truths number one and two; knowing who you are and knowing the value God has placed on you. That is how we are called to love. We are supposed to look at people in the same light and love that God does. We see them how He sees them. And God sees us as precious, priceless daughters.
He says you are worth protecting. Enter: the gospel story, the foundation of our faith. God loves us so much that He sent His only son to take the punishment of our wrongs and protect us from an eternity separated from Him.So there’s no question about it. You are worth protecting, and that is where setting boundaries will come into play.
God created boundaries with both your heart and His in mind. They were meant to be a form of protection. But they can only protect us if we stick to them. So before you enter into a dating relationship it’s important that you know what your boundaries are, where you need to stand firm, and where you can compromise. So let’s talk about four boundaries you should set in stone before getting into a dating/romantic relationship.
4 Boundaries to Set BEFORE You Start Dating
Note: This post is 1 of a 4 part series.
1. Spiritual Boundaries.
So listen, I know it’s almost impossible to restrict ourselves to only Christian friendships. And as a point of influence for God’s kingdom, we would never want to do that anyway. But when it comes to dating someone and getting romantically involved with them, the standard is different.
Whoever the lucky man pursuing you is, He needs to be a Christian. He needs to be on the same page as you when it comes to his relationship with God. I’ll put it like this. A marriage that is not rooted in Christ is lacking. It is a marriage less than what God designed it to be.
The truth of the matter is that the love we share in our marriage is intended to be a reflection of the love that God has for us. That’s why when we read in the Bible about God’s relationship with the church (aka Christ followers) we are referred to as the Bride and God as the Bridegroom. That’s about as intimate a love as there can ever be and God uses it to set the pace for our marriage relationships.
He wants us to love in that same manner (see Ephesians 5:22).
Why It Matters
I think it’s worth noting that, your choice to protect and honor your relationship with God will be the root of every decision you make both individually and as a married couple. In addition, they’ll shape most every interaction you have from this point forward. From your expectations of each other as husband and wife to every form of intimacy (sexual, physical, spiritual, and so on), to finances, parenting and discipline, to relationships with friendships and family, and even on to things like your career and education.
This is not an area we want to compromise in. God gives us that instruction in 2 Corinthians 6:14, “Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?”
One of the wisest choices you will make in your life is choosing to be with someone who is going to lead you, encourage you, and walk willingly with you in whichever direction God leads them in. You can eliminate a world of hurt and future conflict by setting boundaries that make Jesus the foundation you build your relationships off of.
Try setting For Yourself a Boundary Like This:
I choose to honor God by inviting Him to be the foundation of this relationship. We will be a couple rooted in Christ and therefore, will live lives that honor Him and will choose to always be a chord of 3 (see Ecclesiastes 4:12).
Have you ever thought about protecting your relationship with God and your partner by setting a boundary like the one above? Would you stand by it?