Being Purposeful In the Marriage Bedroom
I know, I know, you read the title of this post and had one of two thoughts, “Yay! We are talking about sex,” or “Oh, I don’t know that I want to read about sex.” Well, let me tell you that we are going to talk about sex, but we are going to talk about a lot more than that. The marriage bedroom is for more than just those “sexy” times. The purpose of our bedroom should be many. It should be a place to talk about private things, a place to study the Bible and pray together, a place that you can shut the door and the kids respect that and knock, and yes, a place for sexual intimacy.
What does your bedroom look like? Is it a peaceful place where you love to take a deep breath, or is it a disaster that causes you stress the moment you open the door? If your answer leans towards the latter, I highly encourage you to make it a space that you love. When you love the space you are in, everything that happens there becomes easier. Some would say that it makes moments more special and seem more important when the surroundings match the actions being done there.
Creating a Space for Intimate Conversation
When marriage is new, and there are no little feet running around, interrupting what seems like anytime you try and speak to someone other than them, it’s easy to sit and talk to one another. When that time passes, one purpose of your bedroom becomes a place to talk about anything private. That can mean anything from finances, to dreams, to fears and complaints, and even sexual desires. One of my favorite things to do is prop up our pillows, lock the door, climb into bed naked, and talk about anything that comes to our minds. Completely uninhibited and alone. Not many things grow a marriage more than being able to have open, intimate conversation.
Your bedroom doesn’t just become a place to talk to one another but also a place to talk to God alone or together. He wants to hear from us, and he wants us to be undistracted when we come to him. A place of peace and quiet. A place that you can go, even if only for five minutes of respite from the craziness of life. Have a corner where you can keep your Bible, a journal, and a pen.
You are probably wondering what this has to do with marriage if you are going in alone. Here’s the thing, you don’t have to be with your spouse every moment in order to impact your marriage. You can go to God and talk to him about your marriage and your spouse anytime. The greatest gift that I can give my husband is to spend time praying for him and for our relationship. It’s intimate, it’s loving, and let’s be honest, it’s necessary!
The Marriage Bedroom and Physical Intimacy
Alright, you knew it was coming. Sex! A huge purpose of our marriage bedroom is our marriage bed. There aren’t many places in our home besides our bedroom that we can be sexually intimate. We have 4 kids – 2 teens and 2 elementary age, so as you can imagine, no one has much privacy. Our bedroom though is ours. We can lock the door, and be alone. God created us for the closeness of sexual intimacy. After all, He is the one who created marriage and sex, and it was His plan that they go hand in hand. When we give our whole selves to our spouse, we are connecting on a level that we don’t share with anyone else. We were created to find the nakedness of our spouse breathtaking, created with desires that reach farther than most of us want to admit. Wives, our husbands (generally speaking) have an innate need for sexual closeness and release.
The Benefits of Intimacy in the Marriage Bedroom
It is amazing all the effects that we experience when we love our spouses in the most intimate way possible -Chemical hormone release that creates the feeling of happiness, stress relief, headache relief, better sleep, pair bonding, reduction in symptoms from depression and anxiety. The list goes on and on. Our God made sex vital to us on so many levels.
The list above is, of course, amazing to see and learn about, but what’s more amazing is the feelings of love that flow from us to our spouse when we allow them to become one with us.
If you are anything like me, you probably never realized how important and purposeful your marriage bedroom is to your marriage. It took me many years to realize the change that I would see and feel when I changed the way I looked at “our space.” It’s never too late, newly married or celebrating your 50th anniversary, to make your bedroom a sanctuary for peace, open conversation, time with God, and a sizzling sex life with your spouse. There is no time like the present!
My name is Tina Crawford, the name of my blog is My Penned Heart because I write from my heart. I have been married to my amazing husband for 18 years. I am a mom fo 4 kids. We have 2 teenager, 18, 15 and then two younger kids 7, 9. My children are homeschooled and I am a stay at home mom who is also going back to college to earn a degree in Family and Human Studies and eventually on to graduate school for counseling with an emphasis in marriage.
I have been a Christian since I was a teenager and knowing Christ is vital to my writing. I love writing about relationships, marriage, family, teenage issue and homeschooling. My blog is a blog for all areas of life. I have adopted our churches motto as my own: All of life is all for Jesus!
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