50+ Fresh Ideas For Using Word of Affirmation

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What are words of affirmation?

There’s been a lot of talk about love languages lately, and it seems to only increase the closer we get to holidays like Valentine’s Day. It seems to be the time of year that everyone is on alert, focusing on how to love their partner best – which is why the 5 Love Languages and Words of Affirmation gain so much traction. 

What is the meaning of words of affirmation?
How do you use words of affirmation to communicate?
What are some examples of words of affirmation for him? 

This article is going to cover all of that and then some. You’ll learn:

• the words of affirmation definition.
• what words of affirmation are NOT.
• Go to phrases for affirming your husband on the spot.
• fun ways to spice it up and sweeten the delivery!

You’ll also get tips for how to use words of affirmation in other relationships; friendships, parent-child relationships, and even affirmations for yourself (there’s a whole awesome article I’m excited to share!).

And lastly, how do you respond to words of affirmation?

If your love language is words of affirmation and your spouse doesn’t have a clue what that means, take notes! This will be a great tool for teaching them!

What Are Words of Affirmation?

The fact that words of affirmation are its own love language should clue us into just how important and powerful our words really are. 

First, let’s define words of affirmation. If your husband’s love language is Words of Affirmation it means he feels treasured and adored when you use your words to encourage, compliment, and AFFIRM him. That is how he best receives love from you.  He already knows you love him. If his love language is words of affirmation, what he is really needing from you, is to hear WHY you love him.

Why Are Words of Affirmation Important?

I don’t know why it took me reading a book other than the Bible to realize how real the power behind our words really is. ESPECIALLY  in the context of a marriage relationship (which is what we are addressing today). Don’t take my word for it though. Let’s have a look together.

“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold on settings of silver.” Proverbs 25:11

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue and those who love it will eat its fruit.”
Proverbs 18:21

Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one.” Colossians 4:6

Good communication in marriage is so important! God makes it very clear that our words matter and that there are consequences that come with how we choose to speak. Have you ever considered how those consequences might affect your marriage? Or the man you are married to?

If your husband is a words of affirmation guy and communication is something you struggle with, I highly recommend this Marriage Communication Course! You’ll walk away with ten skills and practical communication exercises to help you work through conflicts and communication in marriage.

The Difference Between Flattery and Words of Affirmation

The Oxford Dictionary defines flattery as excessive and insincere praise, given especially to further one’s own interests. Any sound counselor will tell you that flattery is a red flag in a relationship.

Jesus warns us about the use of flattery in the Bible.

A man who flatters his neighbor spreads a net for his feet. Proverbs 29:5

Nevertheless they flattered him with their mouth, and they lied unto him with their tongues. For their heart was not right with him, neither were they steadfast in his covenant. Psalm 78:36-37

John 8:44 describes the devil himself using flattery to mislead people. Paul addresses the use of flattery in Romans 16:18,

For such persons do not serve our Lord Christ, but their own appetites, and by smooth talk and flattery they deceive the hearts of the naive. Romans 16:18

I share these verses with you to ensure the message is 100% clear. When I mention using Words of Affirmation to show love, I’m not talking about just throwing sweet nothings in your husband’s ear all day and thinking you’re filling his love tank and your job is done. This is bigger.

This is about using your words to SPEAK LIFE into your husband, becoming a source of edification and encouragement; using your words to show him that he is honored and adored.

If you’re wondering what to say to your husband to make him feel special, what words you choose make sure they are truthful. Otherwise, you are doing more harm to your marriage than you are good. 

If it isn't rooted in truth, it is flattery. Words of Affirmation are words spoken honorably and truthfully. Share on X

Read The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman.

How Do You Use Words of Affirmation In A Relationship?

How do you communicate with words of affirmation?

Let’s start with what you admire. What about him made you think he was the one? What good things about him caught your attention? Have you shared any of that with him lately?

What about the things you value about him? His morals. His kindness. His dedication to you or your kids. His love for Jesus and commitment to leading your family in the Lord.

And then there are the physical more sensual things. His strength. His stature. His mannerisms, voice, and countenance.

Those are all things about him that I’m sure he’d take great pride in hearing. But let’s not limit ourselves to talk about him. Let’s remind him how much we like doing life WITH him.

Have you told0…. him you’re thankful for the life you share together; the Netflix and chill nights, out on the town nights, the family dinners, the blessing of keeping a home together, raising kids together? Think about the dreams you’ve dreamt up together. The conversations you get to have. Remind him of these things! Remind him that doing them WITH HIM is what makes them worthwhile.

There are so many ways to say, “I love you.” If you’re feeling stuck and need a bit of inspiration try working with some of these starter phrases and use the idea below to help you get those affirmations flowing 🙂 

5 Phrases to Help With Words of Affirmation:

These phrases are great because they help you express words of appreciation for your husband. Nothing encourages friendship and intimacy more than sweet motivational messages like these – especially when they are TRUTHFUL!

1. I love it when you …

2. I appreciate how you …

3. It was really helpful when you …

4. I love you because … BONUS Save all those I love yous for and craft an “I Love You Because…” Box! Perfect for the men who also value gifts!

5. Thank you for…

5 Ways to “Sweeten” the Delivery

6. Send your kind words via text message.

7. Write a note of affirmation or a love letter.

8. Leave him a kind voicemail.

9. Compliment him in front of other people. I bet you anything this will get a smile on his face and he’ll be thinking about your words long after the night is over.

10. Sneak a sweet little love note where he’s sure to see it. My friend Tiffany created this printable pack of affirmation cards for husbands, one for each week of the year. Another fun and simple way to get in the habit of using our words to affirm. 

Words of Affirmation Ideas for Husbands

Needing some words of affirmation examples? These prompts will help you create your own list of words of affirmation for him. 

11. Thank him for the work he does for your family.

12. Tell him when you’re proud of him and WHY.

13. Verbally support his ambitions

14. Let him know that you’re grateful he’s yours.

15. When he’s being helpful, point it out to him and thank him for it.

16. Compliment his appearance.

17. Let him know you’re still crushing on him.

18. Use nicknames when you talk to each other.

19. Tell him you love him.

20. Tell him about a time he made you smile.

21. Thank him for being there when you need him.

22. Let him know when you’re thinking about him.

23. Ask him for his input.

24. Ask him what makes him feel loved.

25. Compliment his character

You can find tons more ideas in Lisa Jacobson’s book 100 Words of Affirmation Your Husband Needs to Hear.

You may also appreciate 100 Ways to Love Your Husband

Words of Affirmation List of Powerful One-liners

These one-liners are great Words of Affirmations examples. They’re simple but sure to put a smile on your man’s face (ok He might hide the smile, but it will for sure touch his heart).

26. I support you.

27. I believe in you.

28. I admire you.

29. I look up to you.

30. I respect you.

31. I’m proud of you.

32. You set such a good example for our kids.

33. I hope our kids will be _____________ like you.

34. You’re so thoughtful.

35. I value your input.

36. I can’t imagine life without you.

37. Thank you for building a life with me.

38. I’m so lucky your mine.

39. You’re so handsome.

40. You’re a great provider!

41. Thank you for fixing that!

42. You’re so smart!

43. I love your sense of humor.

44. I learn so much from you.

45. Thanks for helping around the house!

46. I love how you take care of your body 😉

47. I trust your judgment.

48. You’re a good friend.

49. Thanks for being faithful.

50. Our kids are lucky you’re their father.

Words of Affirmations for Kids

Did you know kids use love languages to communicate too? Gary Chapman talks through them in his book, The 5 Love Languages of Children: The Secret to Loving Children Effectively. Kids share the same basic love languages that you and I do. Similar to how we use words to uplift and support our spouse or friends, words of affirmation can also be used to uplift, support, and love our kids. Here are some examples of how to use the words of affirmation love language for kids.

• You’re such a great worker!
• I love how thoughtful you are.
• Wow, you’re so creative!
• You have an awesome laugh.
• You’re growing so strong!
• You can do hard things.

How do you explain affirmations to a child? In our house, we keep it simple. We tell our kids that positive affirmations are words you speak to others or about yourself that are truthful, helpful, and kind.

If you want to learn more about how to teach children affirmations, I Am: God’s Affirmations for Little Girls and I Am: God’s Affirmations for Little Boys are fun starting places for young children. Both are written from a biblical perspective and even include Bible verses that show where the truths of these affirmations come from. You can preview them on Youtube!

Words of Affirmations for Friends

If you examine the most important friendships in your life, I’ll bet you’ll find words of affirmations sprinkled all over your relationship. Our friends are among our greatest encouragers. Especially in hard times.

How do you write affirmations for others? Consider their qualities. What brings out the best in them? What strengths do they have? What challenges are they overcoming? What skills are they developing? How have they brought joy to your life? If you’re wondering how can I write to encourage a friend? Or how can I use affirmations in my friendships? Those prompts can get you started.

This post talks more about friendships, important qualities to have in friends, and how to love friends well.

What about Words of Affirmation for self?

We talk all about words of affirmation for self in this article. Just like there are cautions for how to use words of affirmation in relationships, there are important things to consider and be aware of when you are using daily words of affirmation or words of affirmation for yourself too.

Is it ok to ask for words of affirmation? If words of affirmation is your love language and your spouse or loved ones aren’t connecting the dots, your best bet is to let them know. Communicate with them. Asking for affirmation isn’t a bad thing, but I will say how you go about it matters. Below are some starter phrases that can help you communicate your desire appropriately.

• Your words mean a lot to me.
• I’m always encouraged when you take the time to talk to me.
• Your compliments are the best. It makes my day when I hear them.
• Your words me a lot to me, so please be careful how you speak to me when you’re frustrated.
• I need to hear more about the things in me that you appreciate.
• I can tell by your actions that you love me, but it’s always nice to hear it in your words too.

Don’t be afraid to reach out to a counselor if you need help having this conversation.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Do you see how that works? And honestly. It’s a lot of fun thinking up affirmations like these! And what makes them even better is the fact that your husband is going to cherish these words so much because they come from you! You can find a printable list of words of Affirmations cards for Him, here. 

But remember friends, actions speak louder than words! If you aren’t backing your words with your actions the words will get lost in translation. So make sure both your words and action are spreading the same message! 

Can You Have More Than One Love Language?

Actually, yes! We all have more than one love language. We have five. The thing that distinguishes one as more important to the other is how receptive we are to it. The Love Language your spouse responds to the best is your primary love language. It’s the one I’d caution you to pay close attention to. That being said, the other love languages are still important. Chances are you implement them without even realizing it. So what are The 5 Love Languages?

1. Words of Affirmation
2. Quality Time
3. Physical Touch
4. Giving and Receiving Gifts
5. Acts of Service

Keeping your husband’s top two love languages on your radar will serve you well.

What creative ways do you plan to use Words of Affirmation in your marriage? I’d love to hear about them! Drop your ideas in the comments!

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